Stock Market

Friendships are like the Stock Market. It's dangerous, risky, and you're not always guaranteed a return. Invest too much into a bad stock and you'll lose everything. Invest into the right stock, you become rich. Continuous trading of your stocks will put you at a stand still, you will not progress in the marketplace and will become quite discontent with your situation.

I've been doing a lot of thinking the past week or so just evaluating friendships and people in my life, or more accurately stated attempted friendships in my life. I take an interest in someone and will generally want to be their friend. In doing so I'm investing anything and everything I have to that friendship. Texts, Facebook, phone calls, little favors just because, going to lunch, hanging out. I sincerely care about a person. I have a theory that my intensity with friendship is a sort of compulsive behavior which overwhelms people. So more often than not I make this investment and instead of the investment being worth it, I'm let down by people who don't care or really have an interest.

I promise I'm not that bad. I promise that I'm a damn good friend if you actually let me be one. I'm raw and honest. But I have a complete and unconditional love for my friends.

It seems though will all my efforts I still fall by the wayside. My returns are bad, people don't see my stock as something worth investing in.

It's frustrating because I don't know what else to do. I don't know how to make people care. I know how to listen to someone, to love someone, to care about their life, to ask questions, but I don't know how to have them do the same for me.

I'm at the point right now where I feel like I've been kicked one too many times and I've had it. My money is gone. I'm broke. I'm ready to declare bankruptcy and file for Chapter 11.

I don't want to try any more, I don't want to continue to feel hurt and alone. I don't want to sit in the shower and sob as the water drowns out the sounds.



  1. Sorry- my comment posted twice, I deleted one of them, but it deleted both of them.

    I said:

    This is a perfect post. I agree with you 100%.

    I am sorry you are hurt and "broke". Those people who did this to you do NOT deserve you!

    I hope things will get better for you. If it helps any, I am on your side. :)

    Happy night, Duck

  2. My heart goes out to you. My wife often feels this way and it has been difficult watching her have to face this. I have been angry at God because of this, but He patiently reminds me that He is guiding her path and knows her sorrows and her joys. He gives us opportunities to grow even when it huts, which at times it does. Hoping you find the friendship you need.

    From another GMSW,
    == Will


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