Gay Mormon Stripling Warrior

I decided to start seeing my counselor again. I haven't seen him for almost two years because I thought I was at a stage where I didn't need it anymore. The recent flair up in anxiety attacks, racing thoughts, reckless behavior, and thoughts of suicide would suggest otherwise. There was a distinct contrast between this counseling session and my first one I had with Doug almost two years ago. Two years ago I had just begun my journey of gay-dom. I was reserved about talking about things and didn't really know who I was. This time it was easy to be open with Doug and share about myself. I know that I'm gay (whatever, I accepted that a long time ago), I know what's right... but that's about it. I'm comfortable with Doug and it was very healing to be able to open up to someone and share everything that's been going on in my head since February of this year. It made it seem a bit easier to deal with since I haven't talked to anyone sincerely about...

Today (Monday the 7th) I began my first day of my senior year of my undergraduate. I will graduate later this year and move out into the "real" world.  I've been really stoked for school to be back. I like being on a schedule and having things to do despite being completely stressed out of my mind most times. Since I am a senior, all my classes are upper level and quite smaller than the at times 80-100+ GE courses. Most of my classes have 20 people in them. The cool thing is all my professors will know my name and I will have the opportunity to sit next people more than once and actually develop relationships. My first class today just rocked me in a way I wasn't expecting. The professor is awesome, the course seems like it will be interesting. But out of the 20+ people in the class, it looks like I'm the only guy that's not married. That being said, I attend a church sponsored university and the fact the I'm not married or even dating is abnormal. ...

I know that I am far from perfect. I know that I have so many short coming and things that I need to work on, but one thing I do have a testimony of and do have perfect faith in is Priesthood blessings. What I love about Priesthood blessings is that anyone can have one, you don't have to be worthy to receive comfort from our loving Father in Heaven. I spend the majority of Saturday in bed with a terrible migraine. I've gotten migraines since I was at least 7 years old. They usually incapacitate me. I get a terrible headache, I can't stand noise, light, or motion. I tend to get nauseated, flushed, and dizzy. I can't sleep and try to lay perfectly still with a bunch of pain killers in me and a cold washcloth on my face. Ever since I was little, I would ask for a blessing once I got migraine. I knew that if I got a blessing, I would be healed no matter what. I always did all I could for myself before I would ask for a blessing because we are supposed to help ourselv...